By Steven Norris
Have you heard the parable about the snake and the saw? One night a snake entered a shed looking for food. Whoever had last been in the shed had left it quite a mess with tools scattered about. As the snake explored the shed, he slithered over a saw, which wounded him with its sharp teeth.
The snake perceived that he was being attacked, so he turned and thrust his fangs toward the enemy. He bit so hard that his mouth began to bleed, so he attacked again, leading to more injury.
With no hope left, the snake decided to wrap himself around the enemy, hoping that he might choke the saw and save himself. Squeezing with all his strength was the last thing that the snake ever did.
Often, when we succumb to the temptation of anger, we find that we are only hurting ourselves in the process. The scriptures are filled with guidance on how to respond in a godly manner. Consider the following:
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1).
“Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not make room for the devil” (Ephesians 4:26-27).
“You must understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19).
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus warns that planting the seed of anger can lead to destructive consequences (see Matthew 5:21-26).
We all face anger of one kind or another. Anger can be sparked by injustice in the world. Anger may derive from unmet expectations. There is anger when we feel slighted, taken advantage of, or misunderstood. Anger arises in families, workplaces, and day-to-day interactions with complete strangers. What do we do?
First, name the emotion. There is power in recognizing and naming the things that are coming up inside of us. Recognize that they do not control you or have power over you.
Second, evaluate the feeling. Ask: Why am I angry? What is it that I want in this situation? Are there expectations that have not been met? Were those expectations reasonable and honorable? Am I being selfish in my response?
Third, reframe the situation from a heavenly perspective. Ask: What does this situation look like from God’s point-of-view? If you find that your desire is sinful, what would a righteous desire be in this situation? What resources has God given me to better handle this moment (examples include prayer, meditation, scripture, wise counsel, or physical activity)?
Finally, make a plan for a godly response. Ask: In light of these insights, how can I honor God with my response? What response would express genuine love for God and neighbor? What response would lead towards healing and peace — toward God’s shalom?
This is no possible way to avoid anger in our lives. What we can do is seek to avoid sinning in our anger or allowing it to destroy us. Our experience of anger can always lead us to a deeper experience of God’s grace.